In case you’re curious what became of my cold plunge experiment. Here is that story.
It was day thirty-four and I was holding court in the luxury bath house of my hi-rise building in Miami. Cold plungers use their cell phones as timers, so its easy to see how long each person stays in. Mine was about to hit thirty-four minutes!
I had become a bit of a legend in my building to some, and a big freak to others, for my ability to stay in so long! Seeing my timer, fellow cold plungers all asked the same question.
The guy next to me asked, “How do you stay in so long?”.
This time the question came from a former pro football player who looked like he could still suit up.
Having been asked this question nearly every day for a month I answered confidently, Mind over matter my friend!
“Ten minutes is the longest that I have gone. That’s impressive man!” said the former NFL player.
The irony was not lost on me. Here I was, in a cold plunge with a world-class athlete built like Greek God, and he was telling me, a middle aged, out-of-shape guy, how impressive I was!
I’m not gonna lie - my Ego loved this moment!
I got out of the tub with a spring in my step, but a small concern that day thirty-five and forty minutes would not come so easily!
I had a 6 AM flight to Hawaii the next day and the spa did not open till 7 am. Anticipating this challenge, I purchased a cold plunge to be delivered to Hawaii the day I was set to arrive. Miami to Hawaii is a sixteen hour travel day, but you go back in time, so with my flight arriving at 7 PM, I could still be in a cold lunch by 8 PM before my long day ended. 💥
Unfortunately, upon landing, I learned that my cold plunge didn’t arrive. Further, I learned that our icemaker was no longer connected and working. This screwed up Plan B, which was to pour a bunch of ice into one of those nice new bathtubs in our renovated hotel rooms.
Not to be deterred, I asked Lori if it was OK if I stopped at a liquor store on the way home to buy a ton of ice. Supporting my crazy ass mission, and with a hint of admiration for my dedication, she agreed.
Upon checking into one of our lovely new hotel rooms, I made my way over to the brand new tub and turned the faucet on. Then something unexpected happened. The tub has a faucet, but it also had a hand wand. I don’t know if my interior designer was trying to play a joke on me for how hard she had to work on our project, but the hand wand was turned on and proceeded to fly off its handle like a snake striking its prey! It proceeded to hose me down as well as all of the walls around the tub.
Soaking wet from the spraying cold water, I flicked a switch and the faucet took over. I poured all the ice I purchased from the liquor store into the tub and began cleaning up the mess. When I finished, I decided that I earned a reward for my dedication and proceeded to make myself a cocktail. The aforementioned interior designer had thoughtfully left me a bottle of my favorite tequila in the room, so why not! I grabbed a few ice cubes from the tub and walked over to the mini-bar as the tub filled.
Rash gaurd and booties on, drink in hand, I stepped into my brand new tub, proud of myself for overcoming all challenges put in front of me that day. Forty minutes, here I come!
Taking a healthy swig of my well-deserved cocktail, I stepped into my brand new tub only too…..feel hot water! It was only then that I noticed that all the ice had melted!
WTF?????
This is when the jet lagged private investigator in me easily solved the world’s greatest mystery.
When the wand got loose and started spraying water everywhere, including in my face, I only felt cold water because it hadn't’t warmed up yet. When I flicked the switch to use the faucet, it still hadn't’t warmed up yet. But, when I stepped away to make myself a fancy drink, it turned hot!
At this exact moment, Lori walked into the room, to see me standing there in my swim trunks, rash gaurd and booties on, holding a cocktail with a big ass frown on my face.
She asked, “Why aren’t you cold plunging?”
In that moment, all my street cred as a courageous hard-core cold plunger capable of incredible achievements that even ex-NFL players wouldn’t dare try, went out the window! I was just a ridiculous looking jackass 53 year-old only capable of making a solid cocktail before bed!
Day forty was not to be!
Photo - Scene of the crime!
Story To Be Continued…..
