Come on in.

I confided to Phil what I was experiencing a lot of confusion about what I was supposed to do with my life after college and told him all about the internships I had. I also shared with him my reservations about what I thought was expected of me and how I would be perceived if I did not take a job in Corporate America. I will never forget what happened next. Phil lowered his shades with his right hand, just enough to show me his eyes. With his left hand, he raised the straw of his margarita for another sip, and said, “The key to life is to do what makes you happy. Life is far too short and important to spend it doing something you don’t enjoy just to meet others’ expectations.” With that, he raised his shades, took another sip of his drink and went back to reading his book.

Defining Moment #1 – Do what makes you happy.

Fortunately, a month or two prior, I had submitted a 100-page business plan to my cousin Beth Lochtefeld over drinks in Malibu at a famous joint called Gladstone’s. After about two weeks of working and living out of Kevin’s warehouse, I had enough foresight to know that he wasn’t going to help me financially and that I would need to get an infusion of cash if my new company was going to have a chance. I think it bothered Kevin that unlike his crew guys, I was resourceful and did not need to rely on his goodwill or his handouts. If I was going to have a chance of making my new company work, I needed enough cash for one year, and I was willing to do the work to get it.

At the meeting with Beth, she opened the first page of the business plan and quickly flipped through the encyclopedia-thick proposal. It took her about 10 seconds before she asked, “How much do you need, and when do you need it?” Straight to the point, that was Beth. I told her I needed $25,000 to start Grassroots Event Marketing, Inc.

Defining Moment #5: Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it most.

I had met Beth only a few months prior at a family wedding. She had traveled to the West Coast to see my brother Charley get married and because of her desire to connect with our side of the family. She was my first cousin, a middle child of my Dad’s brother. I remember the first time I saw her at the wedding. She was a larger-than-life figure and everyone wanted to be around her. Her smile beamed from ear to ear and her laugh was contagious and was heard often. She was considered the most successful of all the Lochtefeld children. She graduated from Notre Dame and went on to start an incredibly successful company in New York City. She had traveled the world and was as a student of the arts. All in all, she was the total package of sophistication, charm, intelligence, and compassion. It was an honor to meet her and I paid close attention to how others talked proudly about her. I decided then and there, that I wanted her to be my mentor. Meeting me for lunch was the first time I had ever been alone with her.

When I told her the dollar amount, she kind of looked at me in a funny, knowing way, and then reached across the table to shake my hand. We were officially business partners. She didn’t even read the plan. That’s a big lesson for you. People don’t invest in business plans, they invest in people. Beth believed in me and that was all that mattered. I received a check within three days and my first company, Grassroots Event Marketing, was officially born.

Defining Moment #6: No price is worth compromising your integrity.

I stood up, looked them all in the eye and said, “Life is too short. I would rather make nothing working with people who appreciate my efforts than spend another minute working for you guys. Good luck!”

And with that, I stood up and walked out of CAA. They probably thought I was being overly dramatic and that I would soon be back. Nobody walked out on CAA, not in this town. As I made my way to the lobby, Courtney Cox from Friends passed me by as I made I made my way out the front door. Needless to say, it was a surreal moment. I remember thinking to myself, “Hollywood is one f___ed up place.

As I fell to the floor, I looked back to see who had hit me, but there was nobody there. I had ruptured my Achilles tendon—it was completely severed. Now, to make matters even worse, I had lost my health. An Achilles tear is a major injury, and I would spend the next four months on crutches.

While lying on the court in severe pain, I could see my girlfriend through the windows of the gym training her client. I knew she saw me, because the ambulance had arrived to cart me off, and it was a major commotion. Rather than coming out to the court to see what happened, she made the decision to finish training her client and then come out to take me home when she was done. This is when I knew it was over, and I decided to break up with her that night.

When we got home, I asked her to sit down and have a conversation with me. I told her that the relationship was going nowhere and that with all the things going wrong with my life, I felt it was best to break up and that it would be best if she moved out. Right as the words came out of my mouth, I felt a tightening in the calf of my injured leg and within seconds was in excruciating agony. My leg was cramping and was staring to go into convulsions. The only way to get a leg cramp to stop is to pull your foot back, so I begged my girlfriend to push back as hard as she could on my foot. Unfortunately, I forgot that my calf was no longer attached to my foot, so this would do no good. She spent the next half hour massaging my leg until the cramp subsided. It was so awkward that it was funny. It ended up being the last tender moment we would spend together. As she had no place else to go, it would take a few months for her to finally move out. This would become very taxing.

Two months later, I had the added pleasure of having surgery on my eye. If you have never had such an experience, count your blessings. The nurse had to hold my eye wide open while the surgeon stuck a six-inch long needle into my eye socket. It was probably the worst five minutes of my life. I get the chills just thinking about it.

And to top things off, that same month I totaled my Mercedes trying to drive with my left foot. I guess people shouldn’t try to drive an automobile when they have to throw their useless right leg over the center counsel and use their left foot to accelerate and break. I don’t remember reading this anywhere in the DMV handbook, so I had to learn this the hard way. The Mercedes was my last remaining material possession from the Warped Tour days. Easy come, easy go!

This all happened in a span of about 90 days. I was officially in the desert, and there was no end in sight.

Defining Moment #9: The true test of your courage

1) I called my good friend Patrick Combs. He could hear the desperation and sorrow in my voice on the phone, and he invited me to leave that all behind for a few days to come hang with his family. Patrick is a world-class motivational speaker on the college circuit, and is a sincere Dreamer. Once at his house, he fed me, inspired me and made me answer one simple question: “What are you most afraid of?” My answer surprised me—it wasn’t failure. He convinced me that I had already failed way beyond most people’s perception of failing, and yet I still proceeded. He helped me see that I was actually much more afraid of giving up on my dream than I was of failing. I would endure just about any humiliation or pitfall before I gave up. I realized that weekend that I would rather die than give up my dream.

I went home confused and distraught. I called my good friend Patrick Combs and told him what my boss had said. What he told me next, I will never forget. He said, “Eric, ego comes from the mind and Personal Legends come from the heart. UofDreams is from the heart, and you’re all heart!

Then, a miracle happened—it worked. We managed to place 38 of the 40 participants in the next 10 days. 10 Days! Can you believe that?! You can’t imagine our shared sense of accomplishment. That general apathy I witnessed in the Warped Tour audiences was nowhere to be found in our program. We had participants rushing home from work just to find out how we did that day. Once placed in internships, more than a few students told me they wished they were still working for our quasi company rather than at their company. We also picked up some paid spots, which helped us make it through the summer financially.

There were only two participants we didn’t place. They were Chris Duggan and Elina Stavros. Both had very impressive resumes and were placed in the first few days. Chris was even offered a paid position, but he didn’t feel right taking it because he had the critical roll of HR Director. He didn’t want to leave everyone else hanging, so he turned it down so that another person could have the job—that’s the type of person Chris Duggan is. I never told him this, but his act of self-sacrifice brought me to tears. I had to excuse myself and went into my room to cry for a good five minutes.

One thing the foundation did very well was to distribute a very special book. The day they discovered Beth’s body, they found a finished manuscript sitting on her coffee table. The title of the book was Tell Me About Your Dreams by Beth Lochtefeld. I knew she was writing a book, but had no idea that she had finished it. The book was based on her interpretation of what she had learned in the seminars during our summer programs, along with some life lessons. The illustrations in the book were provided by her father, a well-known artist on the East Coast. It is an inspirational art book, made for the benefit of potential Dreamers. Beth’s three brothers and one sister self-published the book at their own expense, and then they made the gracious decision to donate it to the foundation. We instantly became the distributor and sold close to 2,000 copies in the first couple of months. Each time an order for the book came in and I saw one of my co-workers packaging it up and putting postage on it, a little bit of joy crept back into my life. You see, I knew the book would touch the heart of whoever ordered it. Perhaps after reading it they would pass it on to another person or read it to a small child. I realized that even in death, Beth was supporting our dream of positively changing culture on a mass level by inspiring, equipping, and challenging people to discover and pursue their dreams. The book was her parting gift to the world and it is my honor to get it into the hands of as many potential Dreamers as possible. This act brings me great joy, something only a year earlier I seriously thought I would never experience again.

So, I will end this story by asking you a couple of questions. Feel free to yell out your answer. Can I achieve my dream? Do you think I will let Beth down? If I can achieve my dream, then can you? Do you want to be a Dreamer?

If you are blessed and fortunate enough to discover your dream, I have this closing bit of advice: Never give up on your dream! Never give up! Don’t you ever, ever give up!

Thank you for coming to University of Dreams and for your consideration in becoming a Dreamer. I hope that you wake up tomorrow and make the choice to be a Dreamer. The choice is yours!