After a year of coaching from a presence practice master, I have a much different perspective on the Ego.
I use to think of the Ego in simplistic terms. For example, if a friend said to me - he or she has a big Ego, it would usually be the result of someone being overly loud, abnoxious, flashy, or the displayer of any number of annoying characteristics.
As a newbie presence practice practitioner, I’m mostly focused on observing my own thoughts and delineating what their source is. Are they from my own Ego or my Soul? Working on this for a year has rewarded me with an ability to identify which one is doing the talking in most cases.
Now, as a beginner, I can easily admit, and own the fact, that what I do after each correct observation is not always the stuff of presence practice mastery. My Ego still gets its way, but far less than it use to. I am grateful to have this tool. It has already eliminated so much unnecessary suffering.
This new ability has a second aspect to it that I did not expect. Once you become the observer of your thoughts, it’s very easy to identify when another persons Ego is acting out. The easy identifiers are that the Ego needs to be right and be superior. It also feels the need to defend, recruit, and horrify others to prove its host right and superior.
It would be unhealthy of me to judge or compare this behavior. This would just be an invitation for my Ego to come out and play. Instead, I remind myself what it’s like to be in the throes of an egoic led episode. This activates compassion and empathy inside me, and changes the way I react. This too reduces unnecessary suffering a great deal.
The ability to observe the Ego both in my own thoughts, and in others words and behaviors, has completely changed my previous idea of a big Ego. That label no longer exists in my mind.
I now believe that with the exception of physical pain, all suffering from our thoughts is actually optional. I see this as the pathway to peace, self-love and joy.
If you want to suffer less, I invite you to join me in committing to a presence practice this year. I’m going to team up with a couple of Masters to offer a Presence Practice focused retreat in Hawaii later this year in September. Keep an eye out.
